Lesson No 10
Find balance —The first thing to point out is that work isn’t separate from life — it’s a part of it. Once you’ve created space in your life for the things you love, it’s just a matter of finding the right balance between them. Wouldn’t it be great if we could fill our lives with all the things we love doing? Now if we’re blessed to have a job we love, we’ll have to make sure it doesn’t have negative consequences (on your health or family relationships for example), for many people it’s better to have other things balancing out their lives.
Why is a balance between several things that you love better than just one thing that you love? Well, there are a number of reasons that would depend on your situation. For one thing, if you have an office job you might not be getting outdoors enough, or getting enough exercise, and your health might suffer. Another reason is that you might have family and/or friends and if you work all the time you’re neglecting them — and those relationships will suffer. You might also get lonely if you work all the time. Another major problem is burnout — working all the time (or doing any activity all the time) can lead to stress and fatigue, and could make that activity less enjoyable.
Variety is a good thing — it keeps life interesting. So mix things up a bit. Here are some ideas for doing that:
Schedule time blocks — Schedule chunks of time throughout your week for all the things that are important. I suggest scheduling everything but work first, this will ensure that you get everything in and that work doesn’t overwhelm the schedule.
Set limits — This is good for work or anything else that you tend to do too much. If you work 10-12 hour days, for example, set a limit of 8 hours per day, and stick to it. If you have a flexible schedule, you might consider working even less if you’re trying to make more room. What I’ve found is that if you set a limit, you’ll find a way to do the essential tasks within that limit. That might mean eliminating the non-essential tasks, cutting back on time-wasters such as casual Internet surfing, or things you don’t absolutely need to do yourself.
Make dates with family and friends — Instead of just saying, “I want to spend more time with my family and friends”, try actually making dates with them. That might mean romantic dates with your spouse or significant other, or non-romantic dates with your friends or kids or other family members. You don’t have to call it a date, but just schedule time with them on a regular basis to do something together. It doesn’t even have to cost money — it could be something simple like taking a walk in the park or playing board games or cooking dinner for each other or watching a DVD with popcorn.
Make dates with yourself — Often we make time for our family or other loved ones, but we neglect ourselves. Schedule time for yourself, doing something you love doing by yourself. Whatever it may be, kayaking, reading, running, doing crafts, meditation, yoga, going on hikes, surfing, etc. Just make the time and don’t miss that date!
Have a partner — Sometimes it helps to make an appointment with a partner, whether that be a training partner or someone who is going to help you with a project or do a hobby with you. This works well whether it’s first thing in the morning, or right after work, or during lunch or on the weekends. Oftentimes you’re more likely to stick to an appointment if you have a partner.
Examine your life regularly — In the summertime, I use my kayaking time as a time of reflection, but at other times, I take time before I go to bed each night to review my day. Often our lives become derailed from the track we set it on, and as a result we don’t realize where our lives are going until we really examine them. Or we can get so caught up in a routine that we don’t realize we can change it. Regular self-reflection is the answer: think about how your life is going, how you’re spending your time, and decide whether you need to make changes. Then schedule time to make those changes immediately — or make the changes right away if possible.
